i could be off blogging for the next 10 days-- i'm going to Old Orchard Beach camp meetings to do prophetic prayer and evangelism at the pier.
sweet.
there's going to be 5 generals there. hey-yo!
and there's going to be french fries and sunshine and boogie boards and ice cream and friends and pizza and waves and and sand and fried dough and stars and family. i'm stoked.
before i go, allow me to share what God's teaching me:
i'm learning to HIDE myself in Christ.
my good friend Beracah had a vision this morning, of Jesus on the floor. she was desiring to get up and prophecy and cry and preach-- but He was calling her to lay face down on the floor, where He was. she was thinking, "what about the people!?" but He was drawing her to Himself, before them.
He's recently been calling me away from trying to change the Downtown East side, and away from trying to revolutionize the Salvation Army, and away from trying to influence everyone in 614...He's calling me to His presence.
world salvation and Church awakening is still pressing heavy on my heart-- but for this season: i'm in training. He's leading me away from "the people" and to Himself.
like Moses and the burning bush (taken from one of Stephen and Danielle's teachings)-- it wasn't about Moses, it was about the people.
and it wasn't about Moses, it was about the Lord.
it's not about me-- it's about Him.
it's a temptation for me to even make ministry a selfish thing: i want to effect things, i want to change the world: but often my motivation is for my own glory, not for the Lord's glory, or the people's salvation.
thus, i'm hiding myself. i want to be invisible, i want to hide under His shadow, i want to lift HIM up, and i want do dwell in the SECRET place with Him. hidden in secrecy in His presence, not just talking about His presence in the sight of others. i want to have something so special and secret with Him, that no one else will be able to understand it. a private little world, alone with Christ.
i want to be alone with Him wherever i am, for the rest of my life. no one else.
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Sunday, July 15, 2007
Schmunday
a young native man, wearing a crucifix around his neck, approaches me. before he introduces himself, or asks my name, he says,
"what church do you go to?"
oh, such a difficult question to answer. Sunday morning? i sleep in. i align myself with the train of thought that we ARE the Church. our lives should be so taken over by Christ and His Body that we don't need to go to church, because we are constantly surrounded by it.
still, i recognize that to answer this boy in the negative would be a bit misleading.
"um...i don't really go to a church on a Sunday morning...but i'm involved with the Salvation Army."
"you should come to my church! (nodding and smiling and thinking-- no thanks.) you'd fall in love with it. they have real Tim Horton's coffee every week, and free cappuccinos!
and you know the band The Police? they did a concert at our church once! we've also had Evanescence and even Petra. i KNOW that if you came you'd LOVE it."
verily i appreciate the fact that this fellow was making an effort to evangelize. or was it evangelism? is inviting someone to come with you to your meeting considered preaching the good news? or is it just inviting them to come hear someone else preach the good news potentially, but perhaps a message that means nothing to them?
anyway, i do value the offer, and recognize that it takes some boldness.
his technique, however, i do question. didn't work for me.
coffee and cappuccinos-- i could get at a thousand other places in this city.
music-- i could go to a club. go to a concert. listen to the radio.
those were the things that he used to draw me-- and while i recognize the value of making Church enjoyable, all i could think about was how he wasn't offering me anything unique. he wasn't offering me something that could be found only within the Church.
now, i admit that i appropriate the same strategy. two things that i regularly use to persuade people to come to my cells are food and family. i say, "i'm cooking dinner, it's really low key, lots of great people, community, a place to share, etc." so you see, i'm not trying to criticize this man, i'm simply questioning the entire method.
firstly, it doesn't work the majority of the time(sinners vote with their feet-- they don't like church).
secondly, it's deceptive. i have an agenda. i'm only giving them coffee and company so that they'll run into Jesus.
i don't want to invite people to a church meeting (that is, if i was part of one).
i want to invite people to be reconciled with the God Whom they formerly thought was unknowable.
so, if i was going to say "yes" to some one's offer to go to church, they'd have to be inviting me to go to something that was so exciting, and so distinct that i knew i wouldn't experience it anywhere but the church.
what are some things that the church has to offer that the world can't?
-- meaning and purpose in life to the dry.
-- authentic community to the lonely.
-- freedom from addictions, fears, and sins to the frustrated.
-- healing for the sick and wounded.
-- friendship with the Divine for the seeking.
-- perhaps food, shelter, medical care, justice, water, and education to the poor.
even with all of these attractive offers, people are not coming into our churches at a very impressive rate.
maybe that's because we're not encountering these things. maybe we're only experiencing the same as what the rest of the world is experiencing.
or maybe it's because they don't know that it's happening, because no one has told them.
whatever the cause, the effect is that people are not drawn to the Church.
if the Church doesn't attract people to come to Her, then i suggest that we go out and introduce Ourself. and then introduce Him.
"what church do you go to?"
oh, such a difficult question to answer. Sunday morning? i sleep in. i align myself with the train of thought that we ARE the Church. our lives should be so taken over by Christ and His Body that we don't need to go to church, because we are constantly surrounded by it.
still, i recognize that to answer this boy in the negative would be a bit misleading.
"um...i don't really go to a church on a Sunday morning...but i'm involved with the Salvation Army."
"you should come to my church! (nodding and smiling and thinking-- no thanks.) you'd fall in love with it. they have real Tim Horton's coffee every week, and free cappuccinos!
and you know the band The Police? they did a concert at our church once! we've also had Evanescence and even Petra. i KNOW that if you came you'd LOVE it."
verily i appreciate the fact that this fellow was making an effort to evangelize. or was it evangelism? is inviting someone to come with you to your meeting considered preaching the good news? or is it just inviting them to come hear someone else preach the good news potentially, but perhaps a message that means nothing to them?
anyway, i do value the offer, and recognize that it takes some boldness.
his technique, however, i do question. didn't work for me.
coffee and cappuccinos-- i could get at a thousand other places in this city.
music-- i could go to a club. go to a concert. listen to the radio.
those were the things that he used to draw me-- and while i recognize the value of making Church enjoyable, all i could think about was how he wasn't offering me anything unique. he wasn't offering me something that could be found only within the Church.
now, i admit that i appropriate the same strategy. two things that i regularly use to persuade people to come to my cells are food and family. i say, "i'm cooking dinner, it's really low key, lots of great people, community, a place to share, etc." so you see, i'm not trying to criticize this man, i'm simply questioning the entire method.
firstly, it doesn't work the majority of the time(sinners vote with their feet-- they don't like church).
secondly, it's deceptive. i have an agenda. i'm only giving them coffee and company so that they'll run into Jesus.
i don't want to invite people to a church meeting (that is, if i was part of one).
i want to invite people to be reconciled with the God Whom they formerly thought was unknowable.
so, if i was going to say "yes" to some one's offer to go to church, they'd have to be inviting me to go to something that was so exciting, and so distinct that i knew i wouldn't experience it anywhere but the church.
what are some things that the church has to offer that the world can't?
-- meaning and purpose in life to the dry.
-- authentic community to the lonely.
-- freedom from addictions, fears, and sins to the frustrated.
-- healing for the sick and wounded.
-- friendship with the Divine for the seeking.
-- perhaps food, shelter, medical care, justice, water, and education to the poor.
even with all of these attractive offers, people are not coming into our churches at a very impressive rate.
maybe that's because we're not encountering these things. maybe we're only experiencing the same as what the rest of the world is experiencing.
or maybe it's because they don't know that it's happening, because no one has told them.
whatever the cause, the effect is that people are not drawn to the Church.
if the Church doesn't attract people to come to Her, then i suggest that we go out and introduce Ourself. and then introduce Him.
Friday, July 13, 2007
urbandictionary has no clue
My name was invented by Shakespeare, apparently. Shakespeare's Olivia, in The Twelfth Night, is a bit of a weirdo. However, I still consider it an honor to be named by one of the greats.
It comes from the word OLIVE.
I've previously taken this to mean "olive branch"-- a symbol of peace.
But here are some new thoughts about this name:
What happens to an olive when it is crushed? Oil.
Hallelujah, I'm telling you, God is crushing me.
Being crushed is a good thing.
As I was recently reminded in a prayer meeting:
"The LORD is near to the brokenhearted
And saves those who are crushed in spirit."
(Psalm 34:18)
So what if you're not crushed?
Align yourself with those who are.
Share in their brokenness,
become broken,
and the Lord will be near you.
"Come, let us return to the LORD.
For He has torn us,
but He will heal us;
He has wounded us,
but He will bandage us.
So let us know, let us press on to know the LORD.
His going forth is as certain as the dawn,
And He will come to us like the rain,
Like the spring rain watering the earth."
(Hosea 6)
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
where He leads me
"but whatever was to my profit i now consider loss for the sake of Christ. what is more, i consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake i have lost all things. i consider them rubbish, that i may gain Christ and be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ—the righteousness that comes from God and is by faith. i want to know Christ and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in His sufferings, becoming like Him in his death, and so, somehow, to attain to the resurrection from the dead."
Philippians 3.
"relationship experts" suggest that on a first date, a couple should go on an adventure together. a paint ball fight, a roller coaster ride, whatever-- it's preferable to going to a movie, or sitting and talking.
this is because we are bound to someone when we share experiences with them, not when we simply talk about what we experience when we are apart.
i want to know Christ.
to become intimate with Him will take more then just spending time with Him, telling Him about my life, asking Him for help, and even listening to His voice.
i need to experience life with Him.
happily for me, He's asked me to come follow Him, and share in His life.
when i follow Jesus, where does it lead me?-- to the cross...and to resurrection.
i'm not pursuing suffering, i'm pursuing Jesus.
but when i pursue Him, suffering is where i inevitably end up-- because it is where He is. and this is wonderful. sharing in the sufferings of Christ is one of the most binding parts of our relationship. i love it, because it brings me closer to Christ-- beautiful Christ, the only One i want.
what did Jesus suffer?
He suffered physical torture.
i have yet to experience this-- unless fasting counts :o)
He suffered grief over His people.
"o Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but you were not willing!"
Luke 13:39
"when Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled."
Luke 11:33
so part of sharing in the sufferings of Christ includes sharing in others sufferings. taking on their sorrows as our own.
any other ways that He suffered?
i want to suffer-- because i want to be with Christ where He is-- wherever He is.
Philippians 3.
"relationship experts" suggest that on a first date, a couple should go on an adventure together. a paint ball fight, a roller coaster ride, whatever-- it's preferable to going to a movie, or sitting and talking.
this is because we are bound to someone when we share experiences with them, not when we simply talk about what we experience when we are apart.
i want to know Christ.
to become intimate with Him will take more then just spending time with Him, telling Him about my life, asking Him for help, and even listening to His voice.
i need to experience life with Him.
happily for me, He's asked me to come follow Him, and share in His life.
when i follow Jesus, where does it lead me?-- to the cross...and to resurrection.
i'm not pursuing suffering, i'm pursuing Jesus.
but when i pursue Him, suffering is where i inevitably end up-- because it is where He is. and this is wonderful. sharing in the sufferings of Christ is one of the most binding parts of our relationship. i love it, because it brings me closer to Christ-- beautiful Christ, the only One i want.
what did Jesus suffer?
He suffered physical torture.
i have yet to experience this-- unless fasting counts :o)
He suffered grief over His people.
"o Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but you were not willing!"
Luke 13:39
"when Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled."
Luke 11:33
so part of sharing in the sufferings of Christ includes sharing in others sufferings. taking on their sorrows as our own.
any other ways that He suffered?
i want to suffer-- because i want to be with Christ where He is-- wherever He is.
Monday, July 02, 2007
humility bulletin
Jesus was the perfect picture of humility.
He is the King of the Universe, as high and as powerful and One could be.
and yet He lowered Himself to be as low and broken as One could be.
i am just a girl, made of dust, and my life is going to be over in the blink of an eye.
and yet i find it hard to lower myself in the least.
He is so beautiful. and i want to look like Him so badly.
___________________________________________________________________
do you believe in soul mates? do you think that God has one person picked out for each of us, or does He give us options?
___________________________________________________________________
Numbers is a KICKIN book. oh man, i've been stunned by it.
Moses was the most humble man in all of the earth. wow.
and he spoke with the Lord face to face, unlike other prophets who saw in visions and dreams. i wonder if it's a coincidence that he was amazingly humble, and that he had real fellowship with God.
Numbers also includes many examples of intercession.
--in chapter 11 the Lord sends His fire and burns the Israelites on the outskirts of the camp, because they were complaining. the people cry out to Moses, and Moses cries out to the Lord, and He stopped.
--in chapter 12 Miriam gets leprosy because she and Aaron were talking against Moses. Aaron begs Moses to not hold their sins against them, Moses cries out to the Lord to heal her, and He did (though she was confined for 7 days)
--in chapter 14 the Lord is planning on wiping out all of the Israelites, besides Moses, but Moses prays and the Lord holds back His anger and instead punishes them by holding them in the desert for 40 years till that generation dies out.
--in chapter 16, Korah and his friends rebel, and are swallowed up by the earth! if Moses hadn't fallen face down and begged God to spare the community, it would have been the whole community, not just Korah's family.
--and, best of all-- the Lord sends a plague on all of the Israelites. He wipes out 14,700 of them, and only stops there because Aaron runs with a censor and stands between the living and the dead to make an atonement for the community.
WOW. their humble cries were HEARD by God, and affected so much.
___________________________________________________________________
i was shattered on Thursday.
i think it's because of all of my reflections on humility. i've been asking God to humble me, and He is. eek.
it was also a public humbling. great. He's stripping away my foundation and showing the world my blemishes. i am needy, i am absolutely broken.
i think brokenness is simply recognizing the fact that we ARE broken.
i want to be like Jesus, and i want to be like Moses-- humble.
He is the King of the Universe, as high and as powerful and One could be.
and yet He lowered Himself to be as low and broken as One could be.
i am just a girl, made of dust, and my life is going to be over in the blink of an eye.
and yet i find it hard to lower myself in the least.
He is so beautiful. and i want to look like Him so badly.
___________________________________________________________________
do you believe in soul mates? do you think that God has one person picked out for each of us, or does He give us options?
___________________________________________________________________
Numbers is a KICKIN book. oh man, i've been stunned by it.
Moses was the most humble man in all of the earth. wow.
and he spoke with the Lord face to face, unlike other prophets who saw in visions and dreams. i wonder if it's a coincidence that he was amazingly humble, and that he had real fellowship with God.
Numbers also includes many examples of intercession.
--in chapter 11 the Lord sends His fire and burns the Israelites on the outskirts of the camp, because they were complaining. the people cry out to Moses, and Moses cries out to the Lord, and He stopped.
--in chapter 12 Miriam gets leprosy because she and Aaron were talking against Moses. Aaron begs Moses to not hold their sins against them, Moses cries out to the Lord to heal her, and He did (though she was confined for 7 days)
--in chapter 14 the Lord is planning on wiping out all of the Israelites, besides Moses, but Moses prays and the Lord holds back His anger and instead punishes them by holding them in the desert for 40 years till that generation dies out.
--in chapter 16, Korah and his friends rebel, and are swallowed up by the earth! if Moses hadn't fallen face down and begged God to spare the community, it would have been the whole community, not just Korah's family.
--and, best of all-- the Lord sends a plague on all of the Israelites. He wipes out 14,700 of them, and only stops there because Aaron runs with a censor and stands between the living and the dead to make an atonement for the community.
WOW. their humble cries were HEARD by God, and affected so much.
___________________________________________________________________
i was shattered on Thursday.
i think it's because of all of my reflections on humility. i've been asking God to humble me, and He is. eek.
it was also a public humbling. great. He's stripping away my foundation and showing the world my blemishes. i am needy, i am absolutely broken.
i think brokenness is simply recognizing the fact that we ARE broken.
i want to be like Jesus, and i want to be like Moses-- humble.
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